Does he still know who you are? Yes! His face lights up when I walk in the room.

It is not just my face he remembers. He sees his parents. He asks me if I have seen them. (We spent a lot of time with them.) There is comfort in the familiar faces of love and the memories we shared. He asks about his dog everyday and sometimes sees him, too. Ranger was by his side sharing pop-tarts and cheeseburgers when the memories started to fade.

“What’s a memory he asked? Something that makes you laugh, my darling, something that makes you laugh.” – Wilford Gordon Macdonald Partridge by Mem Fox

There are many ideas about memories, the horribleness of losing them, and how to find them. My dad has lost the ability to remember how to do many things but when the faces of his grand babies scroll across his digital frame, he shouts, “there’s my babies!” He even calls them by name and remembers Alex is a Razorback, Sarah Grace has a good job making good money (he always says she needs to where she lives), Jacey is beautiful child, Jessa looks like her momma, and Jovie will always be his “JoJo”.

You see all of these familiar faces of love keep him connected to our world. He asks, “Where is Amy?”, I answer she is taking care of her momma. My dad loved taking care of others especially taking care of Mammy, his mother in law. He smiles big and says, “Good, make sure she gets her some snacks!”

The gift of Misplaced Memories

Our memories are comfort among the confusion life brings. For each one of us that is different. Watching my dad lose his ability to remember is a horrible process. However, even as his memories fade, my dad does things to help me remember. When he is wearing his “brim” or bright colored shorts, I am reminded of the great style in which he lived. From building a horse shoe pit to doing handstands on the diving board, my dad lives life in his own style with pride. The gift of these memories bring great comfort.